30th birthday milestone

Over the month I have been reflecting on so much, since I’m reaching a milestone in my life (30th birthday). My dreams now a days have been more of messages like there’s been too much sadness (supposedly in my “husband”) so I must keep positive now and stay that way. Also it was time to build a house; and remember this is a learning experience, and I had to learn how to be a family with my "husband" as well as hold on to him and don’t let him go. This morning’s message was my money was within the galleries and the events I do, as well as watch my health. I ended up waking up early and I saw an article on US magazine about Mrs. Obama talking about what a woman needs to do to find their right man. She said Cute is good but it does not last, go beyond a title and a checkbook, and see what is in his soul. How does he make you feel? Do you feel completely happy and fully whole? I realized this was the reason I was up so early was to see another message. I thought to myself about who I had dated in the past, and asked the question why was I with them. I was not completely happy with them nor felt fully whole. I know a part of my tried to settle down with them, and then it dawned on me, that I was only lying to myself about being fully happy and feeling fully whole. I thought maybe if I got married overtime I could learn to be happy with them. I look at it today as a fool’s thought. Michelle was right, maybe she should add, look beyond the wedding ring as well. With my milestone around the bend, I use to wish my husband would just come like a knight and shining armor and take me away, now it’s I wish to be able to watch the sunrise, and know that I’m happy and whole. -- Posted from my iPhone